Surrender to Her Spanish Husband Page 9

  ‘So you will sleep much better tonight. No bad dreams will come to visit you again, hmm?’ Rolling over onto his side he laid his bare arm protectively across her middle.

  ‘You’ll keep them away for me,’ she agreed.

  Just hearing him say that the bad dreams wouldn’t come made Jenny feel safe. But with her head still feeling achy and hot she sensed her body succumbing to another helpless wave of tiredness. Sighing, she snuggled down deeper into the bed. Under the covers, Rodrigo’s hand moved possessively over her bare hip.

  Registering the sensuous tug in her solar plexus, along with the surge of heat in her breasts, Jenny smiled. ‘That’s nice.’

  ‘I have even more nice things to show you if you want.’

  ‘You do?’ Just the anticipation made her feel boneless.

  ‘But there is something I need to do first.’

  ‘What’s that?’

  ‘Sit up for me a minute.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘So many questions…Have you never heard that sometimes you just need to go with the flow?’

  Jenny obediently scooted up, and without preamble found her nightdress expertly pulled up over her head and flung to the side. Her skin prickled with goosebumps at the hot appreciative glance Rodrigo shamelessly submitted her to. His slow burning gaze all but devoured her.

  ‘You are like an exquisite painting of a fairy queen come to life,’ he said huskily. ‘Perhaps I have dreamed you up?’

  ‘I’m no dream, Rodrigo. I’m fallible flesh and blood, just like you. If I was a dream then I couldn’t be hurt, could I?’ She heard the catch in her voice.

  Unperturbed by her comment, Rodrigo shrugged his shoulders and smiled. ‘I don’t care what you say. You’ll always be my favourite fantasy…the one I’ll summon when I’m alone in my bed at night after a hard day and need reminding of something beautiful.’

  Not liking his reference to being alone, and the scene it conjured up of him being back in Barcelona without her, Jenny shivered. Desolate, she folded her arms over her chest. ‘I’m cold, Rodrigo.’

  ‘Then lie down with me, querida, and let me put the heat back into your blood to keep you warm…’

  ‘Maldita sea!’ He could hardly credit his clumsiness. That was the second mug he’d managed to break that morning. Sweeping the broken remnants into a dustpan, Rodrigo impatiently deposited them into the bin. Then he reached up to the overhead pine cupboard with its meticulously arranged shelves of bright painted crockery for another one.

  He groaned as a tight muscle in his back stretched a little too abruptly. Strenuous exercise never fazed him. When all was said and done he was a man in the peak of fitness—even if lately his body had sometimes felt fustratingly fatigued. But last night he’d been making love to Jenny until the early hours of the morning. And the more he’d demanded of her body, the more he’d craved. It seemed as if his impossible desire was never sated.

  His hand stilled on the coffee percolator’s handle. It pricked his conscience that he might have selfishly taken advantage of her when she was not totally well, but she had more than matched his passion, he recalled. The memory of her soft inner thighs clamped round his middle instantly hardened him. He hissed out a ragged breath. The sooner he returned to work the better. He was quickly realising that the longer he stayed, the more this white-hot lust and longing for Jenny would consume him…no doubt to the detriment of his ability to think straight, concentrate on his work and all he had set out to uphold and achieve. Just as his father had warned him it would.

  ‘Is there any of that coffee going begging? I can’t tell you how good it smells.’

  Rodrigo spun round. Jenny stood in the doorway, dressed in light blue denims and a sweatshirt that was just a shade darker than her eyes. The picture she made was stunning and fragile at the same time.

  Rodrigo’s heart lurched. ‘What are you doing up? I told you to rest.’

  ‘I’m sick of resting. I need to be up and about again or I’ll go mad. Let me pour the coffee. I can do that much at least.’

  Seeing her hand tremble as she reached for the coffee jug, he tutted. ‘You are your own worst enemy—you know that? I’d almost forgotten how impatient you are.’

  ‘I’ve lots of faults, that’s true.’

  ‘Come here.’

  ‘Why?’ She blinked owlishly at him.

  He let her finish pouring the coffee, then pulled her into his arms. Everything about her delighted him…her slim compact body, sunshine gold hair, flawless blue eyes and pale satin skin.

  Outside, a light rain fell onto the greenhouse roof and the neat flowerbeds alongside it. The air had a real crisp, cold bite to it. In an attempt to cool his ardour—as well as help distract a mind that seemed intent on dwelling on one thing and one thing only—Rodrigo had already been out walking, and the icy temperature had made him glad to return inside. It had also made him ache momentarily for the sunshine of Barcelona. But standing here with his arms wrapped round a sweetly scented Jenny he felt warm as toast and—not surprisingly—aroused.

  ‘I want to kiss you good morning,’ he murmured, lowering his face to hers.

  Jenny ducked her head out of the way. ‘You’ve already kissed me a hundred times this morning.’ She grinned, her cheeks turning charmingly pink. ‘I just hope you don’t catch what I’ve had—then you’ll be sorry!’

  ‘Never.’ He feigned a disapproving look. ‘I would never be sorry for kissing you. It would be worth being struck down for a few days just to have had the chance to sample your irresistible charms again, my angel.’

  ‘But then you wouldn’t be able to go to your meeting and I’d have to look after you.’

  ‘How tedious for you.’ Rodrigo tried to hide his automatic resistance to the idea but failed.

  ‘Why do you think that would be tedious for me?’ A tiny concerned crease appeared between Jenny’s neatly arched brows, ‘I would relish every minute of it, Rodrigo.’

  ‘And you would do it just because you have a naturally caring instinct, and not for any gain?’

  ‘What gain? What are you talking about?’

  ‘Wanting more of me than I can give.’

  Unable to hide her alarm, Jenny stiffened in his arms.

  Chapter Eight

  ‘IF I TOOK care of you while you were ill it wouldn’t be for any ulterior motive, Rodrigo. It would merely be because I care about you. Do you have a problem with that?’

  All desire for coffee had fled. Jenny felt as if her stomach had a dead weight inside it at the suspicion and pain mirrored in her ex-husband’s silky dark eyes.

  Abruptly removing his arms from round her waist, he moved away, leaving her feeling as if she’d gone from summer to winter in one fell swoop.

  ‘I don’t want you to care about me.’ A muscle flinched at the side of his jaw. ‘I’d like us to part as friends, of course, but—’

  ‘What?’

  ‘When I leave it’s best if you just forget about me. The commitment I have to my work is heavy. As I explained, that’s why our marriage couldn’t work. At least I was honest with you. A man like me hasn’t the right to pursue a serious relationship when he knows that because of his dedication to business there’s a high probability it will fail.’

  ‘You must have been hurt very badly somewhere along the line to make you believe that—to believe that any attempt at a committed relationship would fail.’

  ‘No!’

  His denial was fierce. Jenny stepped back in alarm.

  ‘Just because I happen to prefer concentrating my time and energy on making a success of my work doesn’t mean that someone hurt me. The reality is that I’m aware of the false promises a relationship can breed…the false hope. Look around you—how many relationships do you see that even survive? I prefer to focus on something with a higher rate of success…something that does deliver on its promise.’

  ‘And work can fulfil every hope, every dream of happiness, can it?’

  ‘For me, right
now, it gives me exactly what I want.’

  ‘That sounds to me like somebody did hurt you, Rodrigo—or at least poisoned your mind about what can be possible as far as relationships go.’

  ‘Dios mio! How have we got onto this tedious subject?’

  Moving restlessly, as if his skin was suddenly too tight to contain whatever emotions were flooding him, the handsome Spaniard fixed her with a cold glare. Jenny held her ground.

  ‘I know that we broke up and things didn’t work out, but it wasn’t because I didn’t at least try to make it a success! But you- you decided not to try at all. What we had was really beautiful…have you forgotten that? And you just threw it away as if it meant nothing at all. I’ve thought about things a lot, lying ill in bed, and I know that for me life would be pretty meaningless if there was never anyone else to share it with.’

  ‘To look after, you mean?’

  ‘To take care of your husband and family isn’t something to be ashamed of.’ Inside her chest, Jenny’s heart thudded hard. ‘You talk as if it is.’

  ‘You are right.’ His expression surprisingly softening, Rodrigo nodded. ‘Just because I have some issues about relationships, it doesn’t mean that I think you shouldn’t go for what you want, Jenny. A woman like you was not created to be alone. I know that instinctively.’

  Stepping closer, he reached out to circle her waist again. Then, dipping his head, he gently brushed his mouth against hers. More than any of the passionate kisses she had received from him, that tender little kiss made Jenny’s heart ache as if it had been cut in two…all the more because she tasted goodbye in it.

  ‘How could I not wish anything but that all your dreams come true? I’m already envious of the man you’ll eventually marry. When he gets a taste of your love and care he’ll know what an angel he’s fallen in love with.’

  ‘And you, Rodrigo?’ Tenderly laying her palm against his bronzed sculpted cheek, Jenny felt the pain in her heart constrict her voice to barely above a whisper. ‘You’re absolutely sure that you don’t want my love and care?’

  ‘I don’t deserve it. And that’s not because I’m feeling sorry for myself. I’m purely being realistic. And at the end of the day I’m too selfish to put someone else’s welfare before myself, as you do. I tried to make our relationship work, but something in my make-up just wouldn’t let me make it the priority it should have been. I’ve hurt you once already, Jenny…don’t let me hurt you again.’

  Sensing his stubbornness in clinging to such a damaging conviction, she swallowed hard. ‘I can hardly equate what you’re saying with how you’ve been towards me since you’ve been here. Now that we’ve been able to spend some proper time together without your work getting in the way, I can’t imagine a man more thoughtful and caring…and, yes, unselfish. You could have left at any time, but you didn’t. It’s just not true that you’re too self-obsessed to put someone else before yourself. I’ve seen a different side to you these past few days, Rodrigo…a side that really makes me hopeful.’

  ‘Well, you should guard against that, because you’ll only end up disappointed again.’

  Fielding the huge swell of distress that welled up inside her, Jenny broke free of Rodrigo’s hold. Reaching for her mug of coffee, she carried it across to the table. As she sat down she immediately sensed Cozette brush up against her ankles. Because she was so upset, she didn’t gather the purring cat onto her lap as usual. Instead her glance alighted earnestly on Rodrigo’s handsome yet troubled face, and it struck her hard that there were more shadows etched into those sublime angles and features than happiness.

  ‘You claim the man I’ve spent the past few days with is too selfish to care for others? We’re talking about the man who postponed an important business meeting to take care of his ex-wife—a man who sat beside her sickbed all night in a hard chair in preference to going to his own comfortable bed—a man who cooked for her and washed her hair. The same man who’s so convinced only his work can bring him the happiness he craves. I think I need enlightening here, Rodrigo, because I’m honestly confused.’

  Even before he opened his mouth Rodrigo despised himself for what he was about to say. Behind his hammering heart a small voice mocked: You know what you’re about to throw away again don’t you?

  ‘To start with, I think you’re deluding yourself about what I could potentially be like. This is a unique situation. We were brought together by the storm and by your sudden illness. In normal circumstances I would have put the demands of my business first. I’m not going to lie to you about that. I run a multi-million-pound international hotel chain that demands my input to ensure its continued success. I’ve worked extremely hard to get where I am—to enjoy the rewards it brings—and my aim is to continue to work hard. And, secondly, do you think I would have stayed on to take care of you if that old attraction between us hadn’t flared up again? I’m only human, Jenny…even I can’t resist the potent allure of sex.’

  With her hands folded on the table, Jenny raised her stunned blue gaze to his. ‘Is that all this meant to you…? A convenient opportunity to assuage your lust? I can hardly believe you could be so cruel.’

  ‘I just want you to know the truth.’

  ‘The truth…Yes, I realise that must be a real priority with you—especially when you stood beside me in front of the registrar and repeated your marriage vows as if they meant something. Clearly now I know they meant nothing to you at all. You should have told me from the beginning you were only here under duress. It would have been better if you’d just braved the roads and driven away to find another place to stay. It certainly would have been better for me!’

  Feeling as if his words had hammered nails into his own coffin, Rodrigo grimaced. ‘When I said my marriage vows I meant them. But sadly time and a large dose of reality proved me wrong,’ he murmured. ‘I should never have asked you to marry me in the first place. That was selfish of me.’

  ‘Yes, it was, Rodrigo. It was selfish and cruel when probably all you wanted to do was have a brief sexual liaison without any inconvenient emotional strings attached.’ Rising to her feet, Jenny hugged herself, as though fending off any more potentially hurtful blows. ‘Well…in the light of all you’ve just told me I think it would be best if you just packed your things and left. You’re probably itching to get back to work any way. There’s no need for you to stay here until Monday. I certainly don’t want you staying out of any sense of obligation. In any case, I’m feeling more or less back to my normal self now, and I can’t stay in bed indefinitely…not when I’ve a million and one things to do to get this place shipshape before Lily comes home.’

  ‘Jenny—’

  ‘What?’

  She was withdrawing…shutting herself off from him with devastating intention, Rodrigo saw. The realisation put him in turmoil, even though he knew he was the cause.

  ‘I promised I’d stay until Monday, and you are not right yet—I can see that. To reassure you, I’m not staying out of a sense of obligation or duty. It makes sense for you to take the next couple of days to fully get your strength back before you throw yourself into work again.’

  ‘And you’re suggesting that out of the goodness of your heart, are you? Forgive me if I can’t quite believe that.’

  At the door, her glance was scathing. Yet within the bitterness of her tone Rodrigo thought he heard sorrow, and regret too. His chest was so tight that he unconsciously rubbed his palm across it.

  ‘You should just go on your way, Rodrigo, and do whatever’s best for you. Put this whole inconvenient episode behind you and get back to the world you’re clearly much more comfortable with. That’s my advice to you.’

  With her head held high, Jenny left him alone with his own morose thoughts…

  Throwing herself back into taking care of things was what she had decided to do. If her body ached, or her head suddenly swam with heat, Jenny determinedly ignored it. She couldn’t afford to be ill any longer.

  Rodrigo had wounded her with his
cruel words and the candid admission that the only reason he’d stayed to take care of her was because of the sexual attraction that had brought them together in the first place and his hope of having his lust fulfilled. Well, she had definitely contributed to helping him achieve that ambition. But—even though she was disappointed in him, as well as mad at herself for falling so hard for him again—Jenny found she couldn’t regret the making love part. It had been the realisation of a dream she had long held to hold him in her arms again.

  Now that he was leaving it would be all she had to console her over the harsh winter months back in London. Winter months during which she would try hard to keep her spirits up even as she worked at a career she’d lost heart in pursuing with any conviction, living in a small, cheerless rented flat because she’d lost the home she’d taken such pride in to a malevolent fire.

  Seeking to drown out her despairing thoughts, she switched on the vacuum cleaner, running the machine up and down the hall carpet as if her life depended on it. Poor Cozette ran for cover at the frenetic, noisy activity, disappearing upstairs as swiftly as a bullet from a gun.

  A short while later Rodrigo passed her in the hallway while she was working. But he barely glanced at her before he too ascended the staircase, presumably going up to his room to pack. Biting her lip, Jenny blinked back the scalding tears that surged into her eyes.

  She was busy dusting the heavy oak sideboard in the living room when he appeared again. Sensing the aloof air that cloaked him, Jenny shivered. She saw that he was wearing his expensive raincoat—the one that had dripped onto the raffia mat that end-of-the-world stormy night—and knew with a heavy heart that nothing but sorrow lay ahead of her.

  ‘So you’re leaving, then?’

  Pursing his well-cut lips, he nodded. ‘It’s not the way I would have liked to say goodbye, Jenny…whether you believe me or not. But it seems I have no choice, seeing as you’ve more or less told me to go. Can I settle my bill?’