The Man She Can't Forget Read online

  ‘It sounds as though she was just trying to protect you, Gabriel,’ she remarked softly.

  ‘Protect me? From what, exactly? Her love and devotion?’ His tone was bitterly disparaging. ‘I may not be parent material, but I’m damn sure mothers are supposed to love and care for their children—not just abandon them on some whim!’

  Several thoughts jostled for position in Lara’s mind just then, but the strongest was her musing that if his mother had been mentally ill, then it was surely no ‘whim’ that had driven her to insist that her son didn’t know the truth about her condition. The poor woman must have really believed it would hurt him.

  But she didn’t share the thought with Gabriel right then. The clenched fists he’d laid on the table and the tortured look in his eyes told her it was best to stay silent and simply allow him to express how he felt without interrupting the flow of pain and anger that must be coursing through him. Better that he let it out than keep it all in. Afterwards, bit by bit, Lara would do her utmost to try and help him.

  ‘My uncle said in his letter that she’d been a danger to herself but he honestly believed she never would have harmed me. Did he think that would be a consolation when I learned that she’d killed herself? Did he never consider the effect it might have had on me, growing up believing that she’d left because she didn’t want me?’

  ‘Oh, Gabriel...’

  It was no good. It was impossible for Lara to remain sitting in her chair when his feelings were clearly tearing him apart and she ached to console him. But when she got up and dropped her arm gently round his shoulders she sensed them instantly stiffen.

  ‘Didn’t I tell you not to treat me like some waif or stray that needs your help?’ he growled, catching hold of her hand and gripping it.

  Staring back into the starkly haunted blue eyes, she felt an answering quiver that was part fear and part desire run down her spine.

  ‘I don’t regard you as some kind of waif or stray, can’t you see that? You’re not a stranger to me, Gabriel. I’m treating you like I would any dear friend who needed my comfort and support.’

  ‘So it’s back to us just being friends again, is it?’

  Her action purely instinctive, Lara retrieved her hand to lay her palm against his smoothly shaven cheek. His skin felt like sensually roughened velvet. ‘Everyone can use a friend, can’t they?’ she breathed.

  She didn’t plan for her voice to catch on the final two words but it did. Even as she saw the pupils in Gabriel’s blue eyes darken and flare she suddenly knew that it wasn’t just comfort she wanted to dispense. Right then she needed him as much as he needed her and it was impossible to deny it.

  ‘No, Gabriel, not just friends.’

  In less than a heartbeat his big firm hands pulled her down onto his lap and without preamble he drove them deep into her hair. Although his warm breath fanned her face like a spine-tingling summer breeze, it still made Lara shiver.

  ‘I want you so much I think I’ll die if I can’t have you,’ he declared.

  His voice was low and deep, the unfettered emotion it expressed so raw that it almost took her breath away. Lara would have crumpled at the declaration if he hadn’t been cupping her face and anchoring her. But his lips were against hers, his hot tongue invading her mouth and devouring her, and a low, hungry groan emanated from his throat that she couldn’t help but echo as she surrendered to the irresistible fire that he’d ignited.

  If it were possible she would kiss him for ever, she thought wildly, yet even for ever couldn’t possibly be enough. Her hands weren’t idle as Gabriel’s lips worked their honeyed and stirring magic. They splayed out over the hard chest encased in sensuous cotton and chambray, her fingers helplessly curling against him in a voracious need to know and feel every part of him, to have the insatiable memory imbued in her mind and heart for ever.

  Leaving her hair, Gabriel’s hands slid down over her shoulders onto her back. Lara sensed his fingers fumble impatiently with her zip. As if shaken awake from a dream, she suddenly became aware that things were fast getting out of control.

  Not wanting their first intimate exploration of each other to take place mindlessly and perhaps awkwardly on a chair, she twisted her mouth away from his and said, ‘No, Gabriel, not here.’

  Straight away she registered the confusion and protestation in his eyes.

  Administering a reassuring smile, she gently extricated herself, then stood up and reached down for his hand. ‘We’ll go upstairs to my room,’ she added softly.

  ‘You’re sure?’ he murmured.

  She hadn’t expected to hear doubt in his voice, but doubt was what she heard—and it made her want him all the more because he wanted to make sure.

  ‘Yes, I am. It’s what I want, too,’ she answered firmly.

  Lara needed to show Gabriel that she was equally as aroused and needy as he was. She wasn’t going to bed with him purely because she wanted to console him. The man turned her on like no other man ever could.

  Rising to his feet, he impelled her into his arms as if he couldn’t bear to let her go for even an instant. For Lara, too, it was difficult to contemplate leaving that safe haven when the familiar scent of his cologne and the arresting heat from his body made her feel as if she was, albeit briefly, abandoning a vitally integral part of her.

  Staring down into her eyes as if he would see into her very soul, Gabriel loosely circled her waist with his arm. ‘Then let’s go.’ He smiled.

  The gesture was indisputably possessive and it thrilled Lara right down to her innermost core. Knowing that Gabriel really wanted her made her feel beautiful. How could it not when she’d loved her brother’s charismatic friend from the moment she’d laid eyes on him all those years ago? There was an undeniable sense of inevitability about them meeting up again like this—as if they were meant to find each other again. Did Gabriel feel that way, too?

  The seductive scent of her perfume lingered in the air as Lara took Gabriel by the hand and led him into her bedroom. The room was awash with afternoon sunlight but she made no move to draw the blinds. The most seductive shiver ran down Gabriel’s spine as, instead, she led him across to a queen-size bed that was draped with a purple silk coverlet.

  Truth to tell, it would have been difficult for him to note much else in that room other than Lara herself. His blood was infused with a longing to hold her close so profound that it was as though he were caught in the grip of a dangerous fever that was steadily growing hotter. All he could think of to help ease his pain was getting her naked and joining his body with hers. And if he was seeking shelter from the storms of life that had battered him, seeking it in the only way he sensed might provide some brief respite, then he made no apology for it.

  At the foot of the bed Lara turned to face him. Her silken dark hair framed her lovely face like a picture. Lifting her hands, she positioned them either side of his waist. As her melting brown eyes examined him it was as though she were touching him in the most intimate way. Gabriel burned to take her. But through the fog of his desire he vowed to take things slowly, so that the experience would be pleasurable for her. It would surely be worth the sacrifice.

  Trailing his fingertips softly and deliberately over her mouth, he said, ‘Will you undress or do you want me to do it for you?’

  With a soft catch in her voice, she returned, ‘You decide.’

  He couldn’t have wished for a better answer. Bending his head, he gently touched his lips to hers. As he did so he tugged at the zip at the back of the sexy pink dress and slid it down with ease. Momentarily breaking off the kiss, he stepped back so that he could tug down the bodice. The satiny material shimmered silkily down over Lara’s bewitching form to the floor. As she stepped out of the dress she put her hand in Gabriel’s to steady herself and then kicked off the cork sandals that she wore.

  She lifted her hea
d to study him. The undisguised need he saw reflected in her eyes all but undid him. He responded by deftly encircling her chest to undo the catch on her bra. When her beautiful breasts were freed, he was gratified that she didn’t immediately try to cover herself.

  For long seconds Gabriel just stared at her, drinking in the arresting sight before him as though not quite believing his good fortune. Then he put his mouth to one tip-tilted breast and suckled hard. Just as an electrifying bolt of heat ricocheted through his body and went straight to his groin, hardening him, Lara released a soft-voiced moan of pleasure.

  Glancing up at her, Gabriel smiled. Flattening his hand, he laid it against her breastbone and gently pushed. As she gracefully fell back onto the purple counterpane the full extent of her curvaceous figure was at last revealed to him in all its irresistible glory. The luscious breasts with their peaked nipples, her slim concave belly and shapely hips, the silky smooth legs that were even longer than he’d imagined, the toenails that were painted with a sassy fire-engine-red.

  After his initial heated examination Gabriel’s thoughts were suspended as the urgent need to make love to her instinctively drove him instead. Tearing off his shirt and T-shirt, he jettisoned the clothing onto the floor. Ridding himself of his shoes and socks, he undid his belt buckle and left the belt to fall loosely against his jeans. Then he joined Lara on the bed.

  He couldn’t have said who welcomed whom first. The only thing he registered was their mutually ravenous need to hold each other close and be intimate. The rest of their clothes were quickly dispensed with as they embraced, and the vow he’d made to take things slowly fell mockingly by the wayside as soon as touched her. Ravishing her mouth more deeply and hungrily than he’d ravished any other woman’s before, Gabriel ran his hands down over her shapely body and explored her. She was hot silk and sensuous satin, and the devastating revelation about his mother that had torn him apart that day freed some of its imprisoning hold on him.

  When Lara disengaged her lips from his to whisper his name, Gabriel heard the unspoken invitation he was longing to hear and sucked in a shaky breath. Moving to sit astride her, his smile drowsy with pleasure and acknowledgment, he bent his head to continue the drugging kiss that he’d quickly become addicted to. Even as his mouth took hers captive he felt her silken thighs come round his waist to enfold him.

  A second invitation was hardly necessary. He helplessly took her there and then, pressing himself deep inside her with a hungry primal groan. Her heat was like a honeyed river and Gabriel knew he would willingly drown in it—not just once but over and over until he was spent—until every hurt and bitter sorrow that had ever plagued him was laid to rest for good.

  Lara had feared the relinquishing of her virginity to Gabriel. Not because she didn’t want to lose it, but because she’d been afraid that the initial discomfort would prevent her from giving herself as wholeheartedly as she wanted to. But his heated sensual possession had quickly banished her fears. The most intimate core of her womanhood had softened so naturally to accommodate him that any discomfort she experienced quickly disappeared as she surrendered to the tidal wave of passion that consumed her.

  But Lara did briefly wonder if, when Gabriel entered her, he had noticed that her muscles were a little tight—perhaps tighter than women with a lot more experience than her? She should perhaps tell him that this was her first time, but she was still wary of trusting him too much in case he either didn’t understand or couldn’t believe that she would wait so long to be with a man. If she were to confess that she only felt she could be intimate with someone she loved, would it scare him away?

  The thought was swiftly quashed by the sensation of wondrous bliss and excitement that gripped her as Gabriel moved rhythmically inside her and her hands clutched the iron-hard biceps in his bulging arms to hold on. During that incredible, passionate ride Lara soon learned that imagination was no substitute for the breathtaking reality that was making love with a man she had been crazy about for years. Not for one second did he fail to live up to her hopes and dreams about the experience—in fact, he exceeded them.

  As the heat between them gathered force Gabriel glanced down at her, his blue eyes blazing with hunger and desire as if there was no other woman on earth for him but her. It was then that Lara had to bite back her heartfelt need to tell him how much she loved him—how much she had always loved him.

  She determinedly quelled the impulse as he moved deeper inside her and she wound her arms round his neck to pull his head down to hers. Even as they hungrily kissed, the need in her that had been helplessly building towards fulfilment suddenly reached its peak. She found herself on a trip to the stars that took her breath away, that made her feel mindless and boneless, that made her shake and quiver and cry out all at once. Her heart thumped so loudly that she would swear Gabriel must hear it.

  As she slowly came back to herself he gave her a lazy, satisfied smile, lowered his head and whispered in her ear. ‘You’re so beautiful you take my breath away.’

  The edges of her lips curved in an answering smile and he lifted himself and drove into her even more deeply. Once again Lara had to hold on tight to the iron-muscled biceps as they contracted and grew hard beneath her fingertips. Then he stilled and convulsed with a harsh-sounding groan that seemed to emanate from deep inside his soul.

  The sound made Lara shiver. It was as though every hurt and betrayal he’d ever endured had culminated in that groan and was now released. Feeling the hot press of tears against her lids, she wove her fingers gently through his hair and held his head, secretly thrilling that he stayed inside her instead of immediately moving away. Knowing he was a man who didn’t trust easily, she was pleased and gratified that he must trust her enough to do that.

  As he laid his head between her breasts, his warm breath skimming gently over her skin, she registered his racing heartbeat and murmured, ‘It’s all right, Gabriel, just let it all out. I’m here for you.’

  He didn’t look up, just stayed where he was, his body still as a statue. But Lara knew she didn’t imagine the brief shudder that went through him or the near silent sob that was quickly suppressed in case she should hear it.

  CHAPTER SEVEN

  GABRIEL HAD NO IDEA how long he’d been sleeping. All he knew was that it was like the most delicious dream he could ever imagine finding himself waking up next to a softly slumbering and naked Lara.

  Raising himself up onto his elbow, he gently moved the silken strands of dark hair that caressed the side of her face. She was lying on her belly, her lovely face turned to the side. At some point during the afternoon she must have pulled the purple counterpane over them, but it had slid back down to her waist to leave her back and shoulders exposed. It was then that Gabriel saw the perfect facsimile of an ebony and sky blue butterfly, whose delicate wings spread out over the base of her spine. The woman constantly surprised him. Who would have thought that the once shy young girl he’d known all those years ago would have opted for a tattoo, albeit one that only a lover would see?

  Shaking his head, Gabriel breathed out a bemused sigh. But it was quickly followed by a stinging flash of jealousy. The thought of Lara being naked with another man, even if it was in the past, made him feel almost physically ill.

  Making love with her had been one of the most ecstatic and meaningful experiences of his life since he had shared some of the hurtful secrets about his past with her. That had made the experience truly intimate. Never before had he shared such personal information with a woman. Shuddering, he remembered how he hadn’t been able to hold back his grief when he’d climaxed—recalled too that Lara had gently advised him to ‘just let it all out’ and told him that she was there for him.

  Then he remembered that he hadn’t used protection. It hadn’t even crossed his mind. That was another first and a not so acceptable one. Was Lara on the pill? Damn it all, he should at least have thought to
ask her. But he had been so consumed by the fever of longing that she aroused in him that rational thinking just hadn’t been on the agenda.

  If she were to become pregnant after this, what would he do? What would Lara want to do? Would she agree to an abortion if he asked her? It was such a shockingly disagreeable notion that a knifing pain cramped his chest.

  At that precise moment Lara stirred and opened her eyes. Gabriel couldn’t believe he’d forgotten for even a moment how beautiful they were—dark-roast coffee fanned by long, luxurious ebony lashes.

  She was staring blankly up at him, as though caught in a spell. Then her gaze fully registered his and she asked softly, ‘Are you all right? I mean, how are you feeling?’

  ‘I feel good,’ Gabriel answered frankly. ‘Better than I’ve a right to, probably. I can’t help feeling that I’m very fortunate to have found you again, Lara. I guess I must have done something right to please the gods.’

  She dimpled. ‘Maybe you’re not all bad boy, then?’

  ‘Is that how you see me? As a bad boy?’

  ‘I think you have a little bit of that in you, but rather than detract from it, it just adds to your charisma.’

  ‘Tell me more.’ He grinned. ‘I’m not averse to hearing about all the qualities that make me attractive to a woman.’

  ‘What? And pander to your already inflated ego?’

  Gabriel chuckled and realised how much he was enjoying just lazing in bed like this with Lara, in the middle of the afternoon, without feeling remotely guilty or having the need to get up and think about work.

  ‘You don’t have to do that to make me stay here with you, baby. Whatever you’ve got, I’m already addicted to it. That’s why I’m still here.’ Stroking his knuckles gently down her cheek, he smiled. ‘You don’t get rid of me that easily, either. I guess you’re not the only one with a touch of the terrier in her.’