Distracted by her Virtue Read online

  ‘Great idea of yours to light a fire,’ he remarked, and his sinfully velvet-rich tones elicited an outbreak of goosebumps up and down her skin.

  ‘It’s cold enough for one,’ she said and smiled. “Cast not a clout ‘til May is out” my grandmother used to say—and it’s true. Funny how the old sayings are such a comfort … even when you’re little and don’t understand them.’

  ‘I know what you mean. Was the grandmother you mentioned your father’s mother or your mother’s?’

  Making herself as comfortable as she could manage in the hard-backed armchair—not easy when the seat cushion beneath her was worn flat as a pancake from use and old-age—Sophia took a careful sip of her hot sweet tea, then lowered the mug to rest it against her denim-covered thigh. ‘She was my dad’s mum. My mother was an orphan. I didn’t know any of her family. And, before you quiz me about that, don’t you think it’s time you told me a little bit about yourself?’

  ‘Fair enough.’ He leant forward a little, glinting blue eyes watching her with the same deceptively languid curiosity of a cat. ‘What do you want to know?’

  ‘Have you always lived round here?’

  ‘No. I moved to the area about ten years ago, when my sister got married and set up home in the village. Before that I lived in lots of different places … mainly abroad.’

  ‘I take it that you and Beth are close, then?’

  Despite being irked that Beth had suspected him of trying to get close to Sophia in order to persuade her to sell him High Ridge, and hadn’t entertained the idea that he genuinely liked her, Jarrett couldn’t deny that they were indeed close.

  ‘We lost our parents when we were in our teens. That kind of tragedy helps to forge a close-knit bond with a sibling. Beth is a couple of years older than me, and I suppose she took it upon herself to be my guardian. Unfortunately—even though I’m thirty-six and have been independent for a hell of a long time—she occasionally still likes to assume the role. Needless to say I hardly welcome it.’

  ‘ So you came back from your travels to be near her?’

  ‘Perhaps.’ Feeling uncomfortable at admitting as much, Jarrett was wary of Sophia judging him and making the assumption that he wasn’t psychologically strong enough to get on with his life without Beth being close by. ‘I think most people are always looking for a point of reference—a sense of belonging somewhere where they’re unconditionally accepted and known … don’t you?’

  ‘You mean like home?’

  His companion’s voice softened audibly and her small, perfect hands curved round the cheerful yellow mug of tea as if to try and contain her feelings. ‘Yes,’ he answered, intuiting that her mind had wandered back into the past … perhaps back to the series of events that had led her to come to High Ridge and into a whole new mode of existence where she had to raise her son on her own.

  The pretty green eyes that still glanced cautiously at him from beneath dark brown lashes were full of painful shadows, Jarrett saw. In that instant the compulsion to offer comfort was so strong that he scarcely knew what to do with it. But the last thing he wanted was to scare or overwhelm her. In the end he simply put down his mug of tea and bided his time until she started talking again.

  ‘I’d like to make a home here too,’ she confided at last, her tone wistful, ‘for me and Charlie. But the truth is I don’t know if I’ll be able to. Not in this house anyway.’

  ‘Why?’

  ‘Look at the size of this place … the responsibility is overwhelming. You’ve only glimpsed how much work needs doing—and that’s just the gardens and the downstairs. Upstairs there are eight rooms … eight! Thanks to my great-aunt Mary I own the house outright, but that doesn’t mean I can afford to keep it.’

  ‘You don’t earn enough from your photography to maintain it and pay the bills?’

  ‘You must be joking! I’m only starting to build my career after a long period of not being able to pursue it. I’ve managed to secure a couple of potentially lucrative commissions, thanks to some old contacts, but nowhere near enough work to be able to relax and not worry.’

  Jarrett frowned. ‘Didn’t your late husband leave any provision for you and Charlie? At the very least he must have had life insurance?’

  Sophia reddened and lowered her gaze. ‘The answer is no to both those questions.’ When she glanced up again, her expression easily revealed that memories of her husband still had the power to cause her tremendous pain. ‘The only person he ever provided for was himself.’

  ‘I see. I’m sorry.’

  ‘The truth is, as much as I love the idea of spending the rest of my days living in this beautiful old house, maybe I should be a bit more realistic. Maybe what I need to do is just sell it and buy something a lot smaller and more manageable for Charlie and me.’

  Jarrett could hardly believe what he was hearing. But even as his heart leapt at the possibility of making an offer to Sophia to buy High Ridge from her—the house that he’d long dreamt of owning—in all conscience he found he suddenly couldn’t. It was already clear as crystal to him that she was looking for a safe haven from her painful past, and right now he intuited that this historic old house was it. She’d had family here … blood ties. That sense of an ancestral link, of familial continuity, more importantly of belonging, must be important to her and Charlie right now, given their situation.

  Wasn’t that why Jarrett himself had made his permanent home here? Just so that he could be near his sister? Because at the end of the day there was no one else who cared if he lived or died. Despite their sometimes vociferous differences of opinion, and her perhaps not-so-flattering speculation on his intentions earlier today, he firmly believed that family was important.

  If his competitors ever learned that he hadn’t leapt at the chance to secure High Ridge Hall, he didn’t doubt they would seriously think that he’d lost that renowned single-minded steely edge that had helped make him one of the wealthiest landowners in the county. But right then Jarrett didn’t care. For maybe the first time in his life he was genuinely considering someone else’s wellbeing above his own. The truth was that Sophia Markham had disarmed him. The defences that he’d kept stoically intact for so long were swiftly and devastatingly crumbling every time he saw her …

  ‘Jarrett? Did you hear what I said?’

  ‘Hmm?’ Distracted because his feelings had stolen a march on him, he stood up and crossed to the now blazing fire. ‘If you want to make a home here for you and Charlie, then in my opinion I don’t think you should give up on the idea of keeping the house simply because of finances. In the meantime I could make you a loan, if that would help? Then you wouldn’t be reliant on getting more photographic commissions straight away. You could take your time sourcing more work. You could also pay for some of the essential repairs and renovation to be done on the house.’

  Turning back to survey his companion, he didn’t expect to find her expression so crestfallen. The glitter in her beautiful eyes immediately alerted him to the fact that she was crying. Jarrett’s mouth dried in alarm.

  ‘What on earth’s the matter?’

  ‘Even presuming that you can afford to make such a substantial loan, why would you do that for me?’

  ‘Because I want to.’ He shrugged, knowing there was no point in pretending otherwise. ‘I want to help you in any way I can. Trust me … I can more than afford it.’

  ‘You barely even know me.’

  ‘You keep saying that. But I’ve got great hopes that you will let me get to know you better, Sophia.’ Wondering how on earth he managed to contain the inflammatory urge that scorched through his blood right then, to haul her to her feet and kiss her, to taste the sweetly seductive strawberry lips that had unwittingly been taunting him all day, every time he so much as glanced at her, Jarrett exhaled a frustrated sigh. ‘Then you won’t be able to use the fact that we don’t know each other well enough as an excuse.’

  ‘No, Jarrett.’ Firmly wiping away all trace of tears with the he
el of her hand, Sophia rose to her feet and approached the mantelpiece. Leaving her mug of tea on the white marble shelf, she crossed her arms over her navy wool cardigan and turned to face him. ‘I absolutely won’t accept a loan from you. I either find my own way to finance this place or I don’t.’

  ‘It’s admirable that you’re so determined … but if you love this house as much as I’m guessing you do then it makes sense to accept some help when it’s offered, doesn’t it?’

  The emerald eyes flashed. ‘Can’t you see? Can’t you tell that I find the idea of being beholden to anyone for mine and Charlie’s welfare abhorrent?’

  Jarrett could indeed see that, and whilst he understood her very human need to remain independent—and honestly admired it—he guessed things weren’t as simple or straightforward as that. More than once he’d witnessed fear in her eyes … dread even. It made him determined to discover why. He’d already gleaned that her husband hadn’t been the best example of masculinity on earth, but was there more to it than that?

  ‘Putting that topic aside for a minute, what about my getting to know you better?’ He forced himself to ask the question, even though he feared her response wouldn’t be the one he wanted. It had already dented his confidence that she’d refused his offer of a loan. ‘You mean as a friend?’

  ‘That would be a start, I suppose.’ The wry quirk of his lips along with his slightly uneasy tone revealed that he hoped for much more than friendship … so much more.

  Sophia’s mesmerising emerald glance was absolutely steady. ‘If I had met you years ago, Jarrett … before I met my husband Tom … perhaps we would have been a good match. Who knows? You seem to have a lot of the qualities and attributes I used to hope to find in a man. But my experience of being in a relationship has been irredeemably damaged by Charlie’s father. I don’t have the hope or the innocence I once had to trust in another relationship or believe that it could work. Nor do I want you to think that there’s the slightest chance that I’ll change my mind, because I know that I won’t.’

  As Jarrett silently observed the bewitching planes and contours of Sophia’s lovely face in the flickering firelight inside he was cheering—because she’d remarked that if she’d met him before she’d met her husband they might have been a good match. She might also have asserted that she wouldn’t change her mind about entering into a relationship with him, but quite frankly that cut no ice. Because he wouldn’t be deterred … not when he knew that it was the outcome he craved above all else—even above owning High Ridge. And when it came to determination in achieving a goal … any goal … his ability to follow through and not be dissuaded was second to none.

  ‘One day soon,’ he said, ‘I hope that you can tell me exactly what happened between you and your husband. I want to know what put that look of cold dread in your eyes that I sometimes glimpse. It’s my opinion that you deserve to be free of whatever haunts you, Sophia. Not just for your own sake, but for Charlie’s too.’

  Curling her hair behind her ear, she left the ghost of a wan smile briefly curve her lips. ‘Some hurts that we’re haunted by are too deep to ever be free of,’ she answered softly, ‘but I will tell you my story. Not tonight, because it’s getting late and I’m tired, but soon—I promise.’

  ‘Fair enough … How about tomorrow afternoon?’

  Jarrett suggested boldly, somehow knowing that if they left the topic alone for too long she might again retreat into herself and not tell him anything. ‘I’ll bring my cricket bat and teach Charlie how to play, then afterwards you and I can talk.’

  There was a very brief flash of concern in her mesmerising eyes, but then to his relief her expression softened. ‘Okay. Come over tomorrow after lunch—around three o’clock. You can stay for tea.’

  ‘Perfect.’ He grinned. If he’d been on his own Jarrett would have punched the air with joy …

  CHAPTER FIVE

  ‘COME in. It’s so good to see you!’ Standing back to allow the tall fair-haired young man entry into the hallway, Sophia smiled up into eyes that reflected the same soft green hue as her own.

  Her brother David hugged her hard, not hesitating to express his heartfelt love and affection. He was without a doubt pleased and happy to see her. He’d rung her on her mobile only a couple of hours ago, to tell her that he was driving down from Suffolk on his way to visit an antiques market in London and wanted to pay her a flying visit to see how she and Charlie were settling into the house—did she mind that it was at such short notice?

  Of course she didn’t.

  Sophia simply felt blessed that she was able to renew their relationship after being separated for so long by the unhappy restrictions of her marriage. Tom had been so possessive of her that towards the latter months of his life he’d even banned David from visiting her. The only reason that her brother hadn’t fought harder for the right to do so was because he’d feared the consequences for her and Charlie if he did.

  ‘I’ve missed you, Sophia … I can’t begin to tell you how much.’ Holding her at arm’s length, so that he could make a thorough reconnaissance of her face, her handsome sibling smiled a dazzling smile that had the look of a child on Christmas morning having just opened the gift he’d been hoping to receive above all others. ‘You’re looking really well … the best I can remember seeing you look for a long time. I’d almost forgotten how pretty you were! Did the two rooms I got ready for you work out all right? I’m sorry that I didn’t have more time to make them a bit more welcoming.’

  ‘They worked out just fine. After what I’d endured, trust me … a tent pitched in a field would have been welcome if no one had access to disturb me or try to control me and tell me what to do.’

  They both knew who she was referring to with that comment, and some of the colour in David’s face drained away a little. He dropped his hands down to his sides.

  ‘I’m so sorry, Soph. So sorry that I didn’t try and get you and Charlie away from him long before the bastard went and died.’

  ‘Please don’t beat yourself up about that. I know you must have been thinking of us. But the truth is the situation was a nightmare, with no easy solutions to bring it to an end. I know you would have done more if you could have. Besides, you had your wife and child to think of—and you know how vindictive Tom could be. I wouldn’t have wanted you or your family to be at risk in any way. Look, let’s not talk about this today, hmm?’ She laid her hand on the soft suede of his jacket sleeve and lightly squeezed his arm. ‘Let’s just enjoy our time together knowing we’ve at last got the freedom to be brother and sister again without interference—agreed?’

  He scraped his fingers through the cropped fair hair that highlighted his strong square-cut jaw and glanced back a little uncertainly into her eyes, as if debating whether anything he ever said or did could help take the sting out of the horrors of the past, no matter how much he wished that they could. ‘Okay … I only want to do whatever makes you feel safe and secure again. God knows that’s long overdue. Why don’t you tell me how you and Charlie are doing? Where is he, by the way?’

  ‘In the garden … he practically lives out there when the weather’s fine. I’ll call him in shortly to come and say hello to you.’

  ‘As long as he’s well and happy—that’s the main thing. This place must seem like a veritable castle to him it’s so big! You’ve certainly got your work cut out if you’re planning on eventually renovating the place.’

  ‘That’s an understatement.’ Sophia grinned. But then she frowned as she remembered something she’d badly wanted to address since being left the house by their relative—something that had been playing on her mind ever since she’d heard the news. ‘Did you mind very much that Great-Aunt Mary left High Ridge to me instead of to us both?’

  ‘Did I mind?’ Her handsome brother was already shaking his head in disbelief. ‘Are you mad? I was absolutely delighted. Especially when I knew that that poor excuse of a husband of yours had left you and Charlie practically destitute and I fou
nd out that you had to sell your home to pay off his debts. As for myself, I’m fortunate to have a place of my own as well as a good income with which to maintain it and to live on. Nothing could have pleased me more than to hear that some good fortune had come your way at last.’

  Sophia’s anxiety over the matter thankfully eased, to be happily replaced by a wave of the most profound relief. ‘Thanks for that. I don’t think I could have borne it if you’d been at all resentful. And, in answer to your question, Charlie is well and happy. He’s starting his new school in a couple of weeks, and he’s looking forward to making some new friends. I’m not doing too badly either, though it still feels a bit like I’ve been let out of jail. How are Lindsay and Oscar doing?’

  ‘Oscar’s seven going on sixteen!’ David answered wryly. ‘And if his current stroppy moods are anything to go by Lindsay and I will have our work cut out when he becomes a teenager, that’s for sure’

  ‘Why don’t you come into the kitchen and we’ll have a cup of tea and a chat? I was going to make some lunch for me and Charlie very soon—just something simple. You’re welcome to join us if you’re not in too much of a hurry to get to London?’

  Even as she issued the invitation Sophia remembered with a jolt that Jarrett was paying her a visit after lunch, and that she’d promised to tell him the whole story of her bitterly unhappy marriage. She wouldn’t put off the visit, but she’d rather her brother left before he arrived. All morning, whenever she’d reflected on seeing him again, she’d felt almost sick with nerves. Yet underneath the nerves was growing a distinct sense of excited anticipation, and it was that pleasurable expectation that worried her far more than being judged on making such a terrible marriage and enduring it for so long, when she should have found the courage to get herself and Charlie away from the situation as soon as possible … whatever the threatened or imagined consequences.